I understand the outrage over new federal guidelines suggesting a much more limited (and less expensive) approach to screening women for breast cancer. I just watched Rep. Deborah Wasserman Schultz, D-Fla., explain to one of the cable news networks that she caught her own breast cancer at 41 and if she had followed the new guidelines she probably would not have caught her cancer and could have died from it by now.

As jobs disappear and families struggle to make ends meet in this recession, we're spending less, especially on luxuries. But according to a new report from the U.S. Department of Agriculture, a record number of American families not only can't afford luxuries - they can't even afford food.

I was in Chicago with time on my hands and the sweet woman murmured to me - you know how this goes - "Would you like to see the Art Institute?" and I was thinking No No No God No, and I said, "Sure. Fine." "You wouldn't rather do something else?" she said. "No," I replied. That's the correct answer when a woman asks you about art. Yes, absolutely, ma cherie.

 "Don't you say anything bad about Sarah Palin," admonished one of my sisters. "We love her. Be nice to her."

"Life is Short. Have an Affair." So reads the slogan for The Ashley Madison Agency Web site, a business devoted to helping married men and women sexually hook up with others.

You're driving your kid to soccer practice and the "check engine" light comes on. If you're like most people, you have no idea what that means, but no worries, you can drop it at your local independent repair shop, perhaps the same family-owned shop that fixed your father's car. You can trust them to diagnose the problem and quickly make any repair your vehicle for a fair price. Much to your surprise, your mechanic says he can repair the underlying problem, but he can't turn off the "check engine" light, or perhaps, he can't even correct the problem and he sends you to the dealer to resolve the issue.

When seeing is not believing

With apologies to James Whitcomb Riley:

What were they thinking? A panel of scientists has issued guidelines for breast-cancer screening that could undo years of education and advocacy that have saved tens of thousands of lives. In a report that smacks of health-care rationing, the U.S. Preventive Services Task Force recommends that instead of annual mammograms after the age of 40, women should wait until age 50 to receive regular screening, and then only every other year instead of annually.

The residents of Dudley, Mass. have finally taken a firm stand. No, not to change their name to something less dweebish than Dudley, for instance Mantown, Surf City, Hitsville USA, or Copenhagen. Instead, proud Dudleyites have said enough is enough to rogue households harboring large numbers of cats. Town meeting decided that three felines are plenty. If you want additional ones then register as a kennel and pay the town $50. Or just pay $50. No word yet if the same deal applies to owning too many dogs. Or for that matter, having too many children.