Amanda Truesdale and her husband planned to run the Boston Marathon together but never got the chance. On Monday she will run with him in spirit.
In March 2006, Waltham Police officer Brian Truesdale committed suicide at the age of 32 inside the Mt. Feake cemetery, leaving behind a wife who was five months pregnant.
"He was born and raised in Waltham. He enjoyed running. I think one of his proudest moments was when he ran the Boston Marathon in 2001," she said. "He was just a great person. It was a tragic end. You hope someone's life isn't defined by its ending. It was a tragedy for the city. I want his memory to go on."
Now 31, Amanda, a single mother and nurse at Massachusetts General Hospital, said running is not only a way for her to cope with his death, but this year, it's also a means to prevent suicide.
"I think the first year after all of it happened, it was hard to look outside of myself," she said. "Running for me has been kind of therapeutic. It's a lot being a single parent. I need to do something for myself."
After Brian's death, Amanda said she was contacted by Samaritans Inc., a nonprofit organization dedicated to reducing suicides. A representative asked if she wanted to become involved with the organization.
"At first I wasn't really ready," she said. "My whole thing now is if I can raise money and help one family not have to go through what I went through, I feel that's how I can help."
Amanda said that after her husband's death, she began running with a group called the Merrimack Valley Striders.
"A friend who is also a nurse said if you want to get back in shape, it's better to do it in a group," Amanda said. "It was always a goal of mine to run a marathon. I thought this would be a great goal to run the marathon in his memory."
Amanda said to prepare for Monday's race, she runs four to five times a week, including speed workouts with the Merrimack Valley Striders on Wednesdays and extended runs on Sundays of from 14 miles to 22 miles.
Her goal is to run the marathon in four hours and 15 minutes. Last year, while running her first Boston Marathon for Massachusetts General Hospital, she completed the race in four hours and 30 minutes.
So far she's received close to $5,700 in pledges, much of which was donated by Waltham Police officers who knew Brian.
"The people in Waltham have been awesome," she said. "The police and fire have given a lot of money."
Her other goal is to raise awareness about suicide, she said.
"I think suicide has a lot of stigma that you are a certain person that it happens to. Mental illness goes beyond any sort of barrier. Brian had a wonderful life and a lot to live for," she said. "I want to help people that think there's nowhere to turn to. I think it's good for my daughter, too. She's a huge supporter."
Amanda's 2-year old daughter, Ava, her parents Sandra and David Verreault and her sister Lisa Verreault of Andover have been her strongest supporters. Amanda said they plan to be at the 13-mile mark in Wellesley on Monday cheering her on.
"I couldn't have done any of this without my parents and my sister," she said. "I couldn't go out running without them watching my daughter."
This year, Samaritans has enlisted five runners to raise money for the organization. Executive Director Roberta Hurtig said people like Amanda are what allows them to help those on the brink.
"I am so impressed and inspired by people who can make the commitment to run a marathon. Knowing how full Amanda's plate is having a child and a full-time job, I'm doubly impressed," she said. "The fact that she's putting a public face on this story in a way to raise awareness of the issues and raise money for families not to bear what's she's gone through is just wonderful."
Hurtig said, between their offices in Framingham and Boston, Samaritans receives close to 100,000 calls annually to their suicide crisis help-line.
Jeff Gilbride can be reached at 781-398-8005 or at jgilbrid@cnc.com.
